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TRANSYLMANIAMovie Reviews
Horror comedy about a group of college students who do a semester abroad -- in Transylvania. Cast:Musetta Vander, Natalie Garza, Tony Denman, Nicole GarzaDirector:David Hillenbrand, Scott HillenbranRelease Date:December 4, 2009DVD Release:April 27, 2010From:Full CircleRating:RLength:1 hr. 32 min.
Transylmania played to poor reviews. • Adam Markovitz wrote in Entertainment Weekly, "...boasts the kind of acting and direction usually relegated to the adult section of your local video store.... everyone should see something this bad at least once..." • And Roger Moore wrote in the Orlando Sentinel, "...it's unfunny and out-of-step. It feels dated, almost quaint..." More Reviews Below...
Adam Markovitz, Entertainment Weekly: POOR(cg) "...boasts the kind of acting and direction usually relegated to the adult section of your local video store.... everyone should see something this bad at least once..."(See all of Adam Markovitz's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 85 words, 12/11/09
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NEW YORK/LOS ANGELES/CHICAGO/TORONTO (4 Reviews)
Mike Hale, New York Times: POOR "...an excuse for a long series of jokes, almost none of which deliver. 'Call me a nurse while you're at it,' an impaled student tells a dishy vampire hunter."(See all of Mike Hale's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 346 words, 12/05/09
Frank Lovece, New York Newsday: POOR(cg) "Plot: Horny, partying American college kids try to survive vampires and wacky horror at a Transylvanian university.... Bottom line: Drive a stake through it. At high speed."(See all of Frank Lovece's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 288 words, 12/05/09
Aaron Hillis, Village Voice/LA Weekly: POOR "The jokes are mainly of the slamming-your-dick-in-a-laptop variety -- think 'Porky's' with '00s references -- and predictable innuendos about biting and sucking."(See all of Aaron Hillis's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 217 words, 12/07/09
KEY CITIES (2 Reviews)
Tom Russo, Boston Globe: POOR(cg) "...seems like a setup for 'Hostel' parody, but when the 'Van Helsing' riffs start about 10 minutes into the movie, it's clear that we're headed for awfully musty territory."(See all of Tom Russo's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 343 words, 12/05/09
Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinel: POOR(cg) "...a bad movie with a cast of no-names who hurl themselves at it as if it were auditions week at Juilliard.... it's unfunny and out-of-step. It feels dated, almost quaint..."(See all of Roger Moore's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 498 words, 12/04/09
ALTERNATIVE/INDIE PRESS (2 Reviews)
Aaron Hillis, Village Voice/LA Weekly: POOR "The jokes are mainly of the slamming-your-dick-in-a-laptop variety -- think 'Porky's' with '00s references -- and predictable innuendos about biting and sucking."(See all of Aaron Hillis's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 217 words, 12/07/09
HIGHBROW PRESS (1 Review)
Mike Hale, New York Times: POOR "...an excuse for a long series of jokes, almost none of which deliver. 'Call me a nurse while you're at it,' an impaled student tells a dishy vampire hunter."(See all of Mike Hale's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 346 words, 12/05/09
MOVIE INDUSTRY (3 Reviews)
Dennis Harvey, Daily Variety: POOR "With vampires looming larger than ever in pop culture, the time is ripe for a spoof -- though 'Transylmania' won't be anyone's idea of a good one. Energetic but uninspired..."(See all of Dennis Harvey's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 274 words, 12/07/09
Frank Scheck, Hollywood Reporter: POOR "The lame gags, ineptly staged, don't produce anything in the way of genuine laughs... wait for the 'Twilight' spoofs that inevitably will be coming our way."(See all of Frank Scheck's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 433 words, 12/05/09
Mike Hale, New York Times: POOR "...an excuse for a long series of jokes, almost none of which deliver. 'Call me a nurse while you're at it,' an impaled student tells a dishy vampire hunter."(See all of Mike Hale's reviews...)(Read the full review...) 346 words, 12/05/09
11.6 Percentage Points Average Difference Between Reviews (Norm is 18.4pp; <18.4pp = More Consistent; >18.4pp = More Mixed)
Transylmania's reviews are separated by an average 11.6 percentage points. The norm for this measure is 18.4 percentage points. Less than 18.4 indicates more consistent reviews; greater than 18.4 indicates more mixed reviews. In the chart below, each dot represents a review, with the dots at the top more positive than the dots at the bottom. From left to right, the dots represent reviews in big, bigger and biggest publications. Roll over each dot for more detail.
Transylmania (9 reviews) Roll over dots for each review
Coverage:Transylmania's reviews cover 11.9% of potential readers (average is 67.9%). Volume:The film's reviews total 2,690 words involume (average is 20,172 words). Length:The film's reviews average 299 words in length (the norm is 517 words).
Reviews Broke 4 Days After Release (Norm is 1.2 Release)
Transylmania's reviews on average broke 4 days after opening. Norm for this measure is 1.2 hours before. The chart below shows reviews on opening day and the days before and after opening; the left side is earlier and the right side is later. The red bars extending above the horizontal mid-line represent more positive reviews, and the red bars extending below represent more negative reviews. The white space/red bar in the middle is Transylmania's opening day. Click on any bar for a list of the reviews for that day.
Transylmania (9 reviews, click on bars for reviews)
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